Weddings are easy, but marriages are hard.
No truer words have been spoken. The truth is when it comes to a life of coupledom, saying your I do’s, booking a place to hold the event, hiring a wedding caterer and the wedding ceremony itself are the easiest parts. In fact, in some marriages, only the ceremony itself is simple while the rest that follows are not only daunting, but a bit challenging as well. In essence, the logistics of a wedding are pretty straightforward; however carefully treading the steps towards happily ever after is what takes a whole lot of hard work.
This is inevitable. When you have grown accustomed to a single person for a significant amount of time, a sense of familiarity takes root, and when that happens, tedium can occur. Of course, the first bliss and butterflies you had when you first started dating are not permanent ornaments in your stomach, and the feelings you once felt for each other would not necessarily be as intense as when you had first felt them, but that does not mean that after a while your marriage is in for a bore. No—but it does mean that it takes a conscious effort from the both of you to make it work. Learn more about each other every single day and though the burning fire you once felt for each other may be lowered to a simmer for quite a time, you should both do your best to maintain it creatively. If you are looking for ways to keep that fire you and your significant other have read some of the nuggets of wisdom below collected from various happy married couples and incorporate it into your life as wife and husband.
1.) When bad things happen, remember that these are not permanent and this, too, shall pass. Do not let a single argument dictate the rest of your life with your spouse. And more importantly, when it is resolved, do not look for a chance to bring it up again when they do you wrong.
2.) Do not be stingy with affection. Remember, affection breeds affection. Hold each other for a few minutes in the morning, touch each other, kiss each other good morning and good night and more importantly, be intimate with each other (no matter at what age you are). It is easy to neglect these things when you have been together for quite some time and even more so when the two of you get too immersed in work. However, this is one way to make the both of you feel distant from each other. So, designate a portion of your day to your spouse as this will help you feel and stay connected.
3.) Having children can be stressful, but soon enough they will grow up too.
4.) The silent treatment never works. It is an obstruction to what should be an open pathway for communication between you and your spouse. Instead, talk about the things that bother you the moment that they do. Never let your emotions build up or you will likely have an outburst that your spouse may have a hard time understanding considering you waited to speak out.
5.) Be each other’s best friend. Do fun things together and be spontaneous. If you constantly try new things with your spouse, you are not only building memories, but you are building your relationship as well.
6.) When it comes to financial matters, be open with each other. Make a budget together so that in this way, you can make plans for future financial investments and plan for your dreams in the future.
7.) Patience is key. True enough, you are growing old together, but you are not necessarily growing at the same time. You are still two separate individuals; you develop at different times and in different ways. Be patient and remember to give and take to make your union last forever.
8.) Saying “I love you” goes a long way. Never neglect to tell your spouse how much you love them and how much you appreciate them for being in your life.
9.) Trust begets trust. Trust your spouse and at the same time be worthy of their confidence a well.
10.) Support each other and be happy for each other’s successes. Build your spouse up and be their rock for every endeavor they make.
11.) Surprise each other with little gifts or notes like you used to when you were still dating. This is one way of making your spouse feel appreciated.
12.) Never underestimate the power of being nice even when it can be hard at times. But do remember that you love this person so much that you pledged to live your whole life together with him or her. Treat them with kindness and they will likely reciprocate.
13.) Whenever arguments occur, breathe and relax. Communicate without being accusatory and without flying off the handle. Try to be as level-headed as you can be and before the day ends, try to work things out. Do not sleep with a heavy heart or you will likely wake up resenting your spouse.
14.) Be generous with your time and your love. Make a conscious effort in showing your love for your spouse.
15.) Do remember why you fell in love with your spouse and why you appreciate them for being with you. Always remind yourself of this every single day.