Weddings 101: Four Common Gripes of Wedding Guests

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“A gloomy guest fits not a wedding feast.” -Friedrich Schiller

You have invited them to your wedding, guaranteed them seats, offered them drinks and food and had decided that they are important enough to be on your most special day–and yet amidst all of this, they find something to complain about. From your standpoint, it may seem unreasonable, but if you want a great wedding experience, you should pay heed. The truth is, while your wedding day should be first and foremost all about you and your spouse, your guest’s experience and overall enjoyment are paramount to a memorable and fond affair. For this reason, it is imperative that you take note of what your guests particularly enjoy to see if you can accommodate what these are. Remember, part of what makes a successful wedding event is the support and presence of your guests so do ensure that they would have a splendid time during your wedding day. So, in looking for the best wedding package in the Philippines, do consider your guests as well.

To give you a brief idea of what your guests may not like or may not be overly fond of, here is a list of some of the most common wedding guest gripes:

1.) An inconvenient date

In a magical land wherein weddings go smoothly without a hitch, everyone can be universally available on the same date. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for your wedding date. Try as you might, there is absolutely no date wherein all of your guests can be readily free. However, there are ways you can compromise. Do not book dates wherein you know there is a big event coming up such as worldwide holidays and the like. Though you might not be able to factor in every birthday, anniversary and the like when looking at venue availability, at least steer clear from major events that affect large numbers of people.

2.) Plus ones

Weddings are expensive, and for this reason, a strict headcount is needed so is budgeting whenever possible and sensible. However, there is a difference between forcing your unmarried friends to bask in your happiness alone and giving them the option to take a date who would enjoy the revelry with them. You might think that surely they can stomach it in and smile through it for just one day, but at the very least you would come off as insensitive. Needless to say, this is not the best tack for cost-cutting either. While you need not openly declare that your single guests cannot bring dates, do welcome your guests who have significant others to bring their plus ones to share the day.

3.) Long winded speeches

The common human has a short attention span, and while your guests may trying to be polite during an unusually long drone of wedding speeches, they are internally bored and could not wait to get it over with. Your guests are human as well, and they can become restless and distracted—particularly if you have wedding guests who brought their small tots with them. To keep it fun and entertaining, let your guests join in the fun by putting betting cards on each table trying to guess how long the speeches will take. In this way, they would be looking forward to the speeches instead of dreading them.

4.) Ungracious hosts

Remember that your guests took time off their schedules and some may have even flown all the way from out of town just to celebrate your special day. Considering this, it would only be right if you give your guests an appropriate “thank you”. You do not necessarily need to ask them to stand in queue while you individually give them your gratitude, but at least during the reception, do go from table to table and greet your guests. Have a few photos taken with them and mingle; it is the very least you can do. After all, you do not want your wedding guests to feel like mere observers instead of actual participants to your wedding day.

 

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Five Things You Should Never Say to A Bride Before Her Wedding

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“Happy is the bride that the sun shines on” -Robert Herrick

Weeks prior to a wedding, there is no one more stressed than the bride herself. For someone who has been dreaming about walking the aisle ever since her husband-to-be proposed, she wants every aspect of her wedding to be perfect, and the way she envisioned it—anything less than stellar would be unacceptable. Considering how she has meticulously planned every detail of the big day, from scouring the best catering services in pasay (or wherever she might be) to the wedding souvenirs, it would be no surprise if some brides would be near breaking point days or even weeks before her wedding.

Knowing all this, it would be unwise for any of her guests to say something insensitive to her that would cause her to either get uncomfortable or riled up. Unfortunately, not all of her guests have enough tact to practice it, and some may be none the wiser. So, if you are attending a wedding anytime soon, here are some things that you should never say when you are conversing with the bride-to-be:

1.) “Why are you not inviting (name of your brother, a roommate of yours in college, a common friend, the bride’s ex)?”

It may sound like you are just curious, but for some brides-to-be, this can be a rather touchy and sensitive subject. Remember that everyone is accounted for during the wedding reception and more often than not, the couple pays per guest. Seeing as this would be the case, most couples would opt to invite only their closest family and friends to avoid exorbitant fees. Stay out of this, and just be thankful you even made it to their guest list instead.

2.) “You should be able to get whatever you want. It is your big day after all.”

While you probably mean well, the bride might not exactly feel that way. Consider that one of the most private and incredibly delicate matters of planning wedding is the budget, so it is best if you do not get involved. At all. Do not suggest something more expensive than what she has chosen as she likely has her reasons for choosing them (and you will only sound like an insensitive friend when you do). Besides, if she could afford them, she would probably be getting them.

3.) “When are you starting a family? Will you be having kids?”

Again, you may sound like you are naturally curious, but it may come off as if you are prying. This is none of your business. Comment about the wedding decorations or the food, but stay away from something personal to the bride and groom. Who knows? Even they have not even figured the answer to your question just yet.

4.) “Are you pregnant?”

No, just no. Of all the questions you should never ask the bride, this one has to be the most insensitive of them all and more often than not, you would be indirectly insulting the bride. You may have heard it from the other guests gossiping or so, but if the bride does not offer this information to you herself, do not ask confirmation from her.

5.) Do not mention anything about divorce

If you are a married guest, you may just want to shed some wisdom, and if you are unmarried, you may just want to offer a little insight. Regardless of what you are, however, you are going to sound resoundingly bitter to the bride, and it would seem like you are raining on her parade. Remember that this is her big day, so any gloomy talk about divorce, separations and general unhappiness should be avoided. Do not even try to joke about this if you do not want to be at the receiving end of the bride’s or her her other guests’ death glares.

 

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Things you should know about being a Wedding Guest

 

 

We have all attended weddings at some point in our lives. For some in the latter part of their twenties, it becomes a rather regular occasion with your news feed popping up now and then showing your friends’ and acquaintances proposal and wedding videos. However, being a wedding guest is not all about dressing up, showing up to the affair and eating some of the great food offered by the wedding caterer.

No, weddings are not only about the romance and the glam and if you have attended enough weddings in a lifetime, but you will also certainly notice a trend. And though all the guests would be able to speak of is the glamour of the event, there are some things that they are aware of but just would not talk about. The fact is, there are things you should aptly observe the next time you are invited to a wedding and see if any of the things below are true for you as it currently is for us.

1.) At some point in your life, it will occur at least three to five times in a year. When you are at a certain age, it is inevitable that you have friends who are approximately around your age, and these friends may choose to get married roughly in the same year. Think of it as a welcome way to dress up instead and try to think of ways to make one wedding outfit different for every wedding you attend if you are on a budget. You do not want to look glaringly the same in every wedding taken photo after all.

2.) A majority of the speeches you will hear would sound the same. Though this largely depends on who the couple elects to their speech, a standard practice has been that the best man and the maid of honor do the toasts. Unless the groom’s best man is someone other than his best friend, most of their speeches will be anecdotes and a retelling of how the couple met and how rowdy their initial days were. The bride will probably have a gushy and cheesy speech at the end of the night, and it may leave some of the more sentimental and emotional guests in tears.

3.) People often overlook the fact that the half-filled glass of champagne is saved for toasts. It may seem obvious to some. However, this may come as a surprise to many people, but the glass half-filled with champagne is reserved for toasts and should not be drunk during dinner—unless you plan on getting hammered that is. Remember, you may probably have a lot more toasts to sip to, so try to keep your sips to a minimum.

4.) RSVP’ing is apparently more important than people originally thought. Apart from it being the courteous thing to do, it helps the couple account for the heads they are about to feed during their wedding. When you do receive your invitation, RSVP as soon as possible and do not attend the wedding with an uninvited guest or even show up unannounced. When you fail to RSVP, the couple may assume you are not coming which means your designated spot and the budget allocated for you may have been given to someone else.

5.) You will inevitably imagine how your own wedding would look like. Even if you are not the romantic and sentimental type, envisioning how yours would look like is an inescapable thought. Though not necessarily focused on the syrupy aspect of a wedding, you will probably think of what kind of flowers you are going to have, how your entourage would look like if you would probably do the same things that the couple did, etc.

6.) At all costs, do not be the center of attention. Whether it may be from all the ruckus you are causing from being way too intoxicated or from the looks you are getting with the type of garb you are wearing, you should never be the center of attention during a couple’s big day. Not only will you come off as self-absorbed and selfish, but you are taking a couple’s chance to have a day to be all about them. So for the day, suck it up and behave yourself. You will have your own wedding soon, and you probably would not want anyone stealing your spotlight either.